4 more weeks of taxol. We are on the downward stretch. Thank god as I am tired and have an mad rash over my body which I'm pretty sure is from the taxol.
My poor family has been through so much trauma this year, on Monday my mother in law died suddenly leaving my husband devastated. Then when my eldest asked for a day off for the funeral, they sacked her! Nice and understanding. Just what you want in an employer. 2012 can go bite my ass! How much more can a family take? I feel on the edge of things sometimes especially where my girls are concerned. I want to protect them from bullies and manipulators but it's so hard especially when they are in their place of employment and in their other home.
Their father and his girlfriend are some of the worst. What kind of people emotionally manipulate a little girl who wants to spend some extra time with her mother while she is going through breast cancer treatment because she is afraid she may die? Selfish emotionally immature ones that's who. My poor girl was made to feel guilty by a father who said he would be sad if she spent an extra 3 days a fortnight with me and his girlfriend who thought that things should be kept as normal. What's normal about this situation? Nothing! Whats normal about shared care of children? Nothing! It just confuses them and leaves with a sense of not having a true home base. And another thing, whose business is it of yours to be sticking your nose in making my child confused and upset? You've been around for 5 minutes and while you try and portray happy families with your sickeningly sweet Facebook posts on my daughters wall(designed so I can see them? Yes I think so) the truth is that one who has to try so hard, must be seriously lacking in that which she so desires. I think life behind closed doors is very different, especially if you constantly feel the need to get one up on someone with breast cancer going through chemotherapy! Maybe I'm being emotional and over sensitive, but it's not just me who has seen and commented on it. My friends and family have all asked what her story is? It's very hard to see your children being manipulated when they just need a little bit of understanding. Who would it have hurt to say sure sweetheart, we understand this is a hard time, go and spend some extra time with your mum and when all this settles down, we can reasses the situation then. But I guess a man who thinks his child is over it and healed from a fun afternoon in the pool is about as emotionally deep as an evaporated puddle.
And now I have my husband to look after and his father who has been staying at our house since the death. I was reminded of our emotionally fragile we all are when my husband became upset on fathers day because no one had said happy fathers day to him. It wasn't intentional, I was just waiting for all the girls to be together to give him his gifts. But we are all hypersensitive at the moment.
And so on the eve of my mother in laws funeral, I have my girls home with me again and I am complete. Now just to get through tomorrow!
